Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Rubric Evaluation of Research Paper

By Sarah Moore

Re-reading my introduction, I'm not at all satisfied with the wording or general idea it's giving. I would say, based on the rubric in our syllabus, that my intro would either be a Weak (D) or Competent (C). My ideas are hard to follow based on how they're presented, and my argument is not very apparent. I really dislike my sentences, they seem really jumbled. The reason why I'm targeting my introduction is because it's one of the most important paragraphs, and since it's the very first thing my reader will see, it should be good and coherent. I think I can improve it by listing my subjects in order, using more examples, and making sure my writing flows well.

I feel like one thing that I have done well with, especially in my revision over the weekend, was adding more credible sources. There aren't necessary four in each paragraph, but there are definitely six to eight throughout, which could make my paper Strong (B). Improvements could be, however, to include more, and better connect them to my ideas.

My formatting has consistent flaws, so most likely that area is Competent (C). I have a strange habit of making all of my citations in the Works Cited page APA format, rather than the correct MLA format. There are also a few errors after I add credit to a quote I just paraphrased or quoted that I need to work on. I can hopefully bump my formatting up to a Strong (B) or Superior (A) by really studying helpful citation websites like purdue owl, or asking the help of a classmate.
Research essay Revision

By Sarah Daly


   One of the criteria that I have a superior handle on is my thesis it is very clear and to the point. One

of the criteria that is competent is my documentation style. I have all the in work citations but there

are many errors with the grammar and placement of the citations. I believe i will easily be able to fix

these before i turn in my final draft. On of the areas that my paper is weak on is the grammar and

formatting. I have several grammar and wording issues.  

Essay Rubric Evaluation

By Nora Hixson

-My thesis I think would be Strong, but not Superior. I think this would be because The people who reviewed my rough drafts were able to find two Freaking Points instead of just having one clear one.

 -I think my Clarity/Coherence would also be a Strong because I do have a few run-on sentences and sometimes my paragraphs don't really flow together.

-For Use of Sources I think I would be either a Strong or a Competent because I have not used nearly enough of them in my rough drafts and sometimes I will use them incorrectly in my writing.

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Reviewing Essays In-Class:

By Sarah Moore

Three things I improved:

  • I took into account the feedback my partner Nora wrote, which was rewording the awkward sentences, taking out ideas that didn't match my thesis, and adding support ideas.
  • I rewrote my introduction, added more to my first body paragraph, and wrote the second body paragraph, as well as added (some scrambled) points to follow in each of my paragraphs for when I next edit it.
  • I found and cited several more sources and incorporated them especially in my second body paragraph. 
Three things my partner improved on: Nora Hixson
  • She added a bunch more detail to all of her paragraphs--I definitely saw an increase in size.
  • At the end of each paragraph, I could tell what her points were much clearer than I could've before; I can tell she spent time on evaluating what she really wanted each paragraph to say.
  • Particularly in the second body paragraph, she uses a positive amount of ethos. 

Improvements on rough Draft for research essays.

By Sarah Daly

     The essay that i reviewed was about how pet ownership and therapy animals improve health.

 Since i read this essay on Tuesday she improved her conclusion to include her stronger points of her

essay. She is still waiting to hear back from a few of her expert sources but her other facts are well

implemented into her essay for smooth and well places facts. This essay also has a large work cited

page and many valid and creditable source that have enhanced her thesis.

    Some of the improvements towards my essay is that I completed my counterargument and then

also my counter to my counterargument. I also tried to beef up my introduction to make it more

engaging. I also had someone else edit my paper and give me feed back with my spelling and word

chose.



In-Class Essay Review

By Nora Hixson

Ways I improved: 

1. My body paragraphs were not at all complete, so I turned them from being one sentence each to almost all of them being long paragraphs.

2. I started using my sources and citations to back up my claims and to make them more specific.

3. I tried to re-word all of my awkward sentences and made them sound more professional and clear.

Ways my partner improved: Sarah Moore

1. She took my feedback into consideration and re-worded some of her sentences.

2. She added more sources and information into her arguments and added citations.

3. She also explained the difficult terms and ideas more thoroughly and made them easier to understand.  

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Reading Response: Chapter 17



By Nora Hixson


Personal Response: This chapter was very useful to me because it talked about how to properly use sources in your writing. It focused on the different ways to integrate the support into your writing, like paraphrasing, summarizing, quoting, and synthesizing. I think these are all very useful, especially as we work on our research papers in class.

Professional Response: I think the most important part of this chapter was the lay out of all different forms of plagiarism and how to avoid them. It gave guidelines for the best ways to avoid it, as well as examples of the most common mistakes that end up in plagiarism. I will definitely be using this chapter as we continue to work on our research papers.



http://www.scribendi.com/images/cms/2009-10/Plagiarism_And_Its_Repercussions_photo_FINALIZED.jpg
Picture: Here

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Chapter 17: Reading Response


By Sarah Moore

Personal Response: 
This chapter did a great job explaining what paraphrasing, summarizing, quoting, and synthesizing are, and simplified each term so they were easy to distinguish. I found all of it very helpful, and especially good guidelines to follow as our class begins to polish our research essays. 


Professional Response: 
In this chapter, I learned the multiple methods a writer can use to cite or quote a book in their paper. Adding quotations or research from credible studies validates any paper or argument, adds necessary support bits, and I feel is really crucial in getting a good grade. That's why this chapter was so helpful, because it breaks down all of the various ways you can use quotations, and makes it easy to apply. To summarize, paraphrasing is when you reword a person's thought, but strictly in your own words. They do not need quotation marks. Summarizing is pretty much the opposite of paraphrasing; you use your own words to explain the general purpose of the thought. Quoting does involve quotation marks, because you are using the author's exact words. And last of all, synthesizing is the combination of the three, and can be rather large as it includes several/all of your sources. 



Image result for quoting

Photo Credit: Here

Chapter 17 Reading Response.
By Sarah Daly

    Integrating Sources and Avoiding Plagiarism

Professional Response
        I think this is a very good chapter when writing a paper. It makes the point that you want to paraphrase and summarize more then have direct quotes. It helps the paper flow better and helps you get your point across in your own words. Plagiarism usually occurs because of carelessness or poor time management. It could be either intentional or unintentional.

Personal Response
       I think this is an important chapter. It gives good tips on including paraphrasing, summaries, or direct quotes. I find it easier and clearing when i read a paper to have the author summaries or paraphrase their sources rather then directly quote. It helps the paper flow better and keeps the same tone. The part of plagiarism always makes me nervous. I don't trust myself to cite my sources correctly all the time even if my intent isn't to copy someone else's work.










Thursday, November 5, 2015

Ethos, Pathos, and Logos

By Sarah Moore



Ethos: Ethos is used to insight validity and plausibility to support the author's argument. Usually specialists, experts, or people the author knows are reliable are used as Ethos.

Pathos: Pathos appeals to the emotion, typically of the reader, to aid in the author's argument or debate.

Logos: Logos is when the thought or idea is logical and makes a clear and valid point. It's critical in winning any argument or debate.  


Support Bits:


Pathos:
  • Introverts are more likely to become depressed than extroverts.
  • People often mistake introverts for being socially anxious and uncomfortable, and therefore put less effort into getting to know them. 
  • Introverted people are constantly downgraded in their jobs because individuals who are more outgoing and charismatic are more appealing. 
Ethos: 
  • It's wrong to automatically assume that we must either be purely introverted or purely extroverted, when really, most people often share qualities of both. ("The Brain Of An Introvert
  • Compared To That Of An Extrovert: Are They Really Different?") This is food for thought before any extrovert can claim that they are the 'better personality', when probably, they are also slightly introverted.
  • An article by Vijaya Lakshmi says it's important to know each person's unique personality type in order to better prepare them for the future. ("Personality Profiling Of Introverts And Extroverts.")
  • How much does the average person really know about introverts? If you're an extrovert, isn't it important to know your opposite? It's likely that the individual has at least three or four friends who are introverted, maybe even a spouse. Author Susan Cain communicates the importance of understanding introverts, and is a credible source as a published and well-known author. (Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking)
Logos: 
  • Often in the workforce, introverts don't fit the desired mold of a boisterous, confrontational salesman, and therefore are less preferred for jobs. ("Introverts in an Extrovert Society « Generation C Magazine.")
  • Extroverts in the workplace, though they are preferred more, tend to me more dishonest and distrustful than an introvert in the workplace. Are extroverts really the right personality type to be preferred? ("Are Dishonest Extroverts More Harmful Than Dishonest Introverts? The Interaction Effects Of Honesty-Humility And Extraversion In Predicting Workplace Deviance.")
  • Why are we as individuals determined to isolate one personality type from the other? The truth is we shouldn't, because we actually all carry characteristics of both introverts and extroverts. ("The Brain Of An Introvert Compared To That Of An Extrovert: Are They Really Different?")

Pathos, Logos, and Ethos

By Nora Hixson

Definitions:

-Pathos: the use of emotion in an argument to appeal to the reader

-Logos: the use of logical statements to appeal to reason

-Ethos: the credibility of the author to prove that they know what they are talking about

Support Bits for Essay:

-Pathos:
      1. Many people suffer from eating disorders and other body-image issues, but never tell anyone.
      2. The number of people who are comfortable with their bodies and how they look is significantly smaller than the number of people who aren't happy with themselves.
      3. Most girls would rather starve themselves to look like the photo-shopped model in a magazine than be the way they are.

-Logos:
      1. A study done showed that 40% of girls between the ages of 9 and 10 have tried to lose excessive amounts of weight. ("Teen Health and the Media")
      2. The obsession with appearance is obvious in movies and TV, as it was shown that 58% of all female characters in movies had their appearance commented on, and 28% in TV shows. ("Teen Health and the Media")
      3. A test done showed that the longer a person spent on Facebook, the more likely they were to have long-lasting anxiety related to body-image. (Mabe)

-Ethos:
      1. According to the medical journal, "Women's Exposure to Thin-and-beautiful Media Images: Body Image Effects of Media-ideal Internalization and Impact-reduction Interventions," there are ways of possibly decreasing the affect that the media has on body-image. (Yamamiya)
2. The Berkman Center for Internet & Society at Harvard University did a study about the massive increase in the use of social media over the past few years, and how people love the idea of controlling who they are to people online. (Madden)
3. According to analysis of teen profile pictures, a teen who read more magazines was more likely to post a picture of themselves in revealing clothing, due to the provocative images that are frequently shown in the magazines. (Kapidzic)

Works Cited:

Kapidzic, Sanja, and Nicole Martins. EBSCO. N.p., n.d. Web. 14 Oct. 2015.

Madden, Mary, Amanda Lenhart, Sandra Cortesi, Urs Gasser, Maeve Duggan, Aaron Smith, and

Meredith Beaton. "Teens, Social Media, and Privacy." La Tele Di Penelope - Pre Home Page. The Berkman Center for Internet & Society at Harvard University, 21 May 2013. Web. 14 Oct. 2015.
"Teen Health and the Media." UW Departments Web Server. N.p., n.d. Web. 3 Nov. 2015.
Yamamiya, Yuko, Thomas F. Cash, Susan E. Melnyk, Heidi D. Posavac, and Steven S. Posavac.
"Women's Exposure to Thin-and-beautiful Media Images: Body Image Effects of Media-ideal Internalization and Impact-reduction Interventions."ScienceDirect.com | Science, Health and Medical Journals, Full Text Articles and Books. N.p., Mar. 2005. Web. 3 Nov. 2015.
Mabe, Annalise G., Jean K. Forney, and Pamela K. Keel. "Do You 'like' My Photo? Facebook
Use Maintains Eating Disorder Risk." EBSCO. International Journal of Eating Disorders, n.d. Web. 3 Nov. 2015.

Monday, November 2, 2015

Chapter 16 Reading Response

Personal Response: This chapter was completely focused on the importance of using reliable sources to back up your arguments. It stressed the importance of using library databases that hold scholarly articles and other writings instead of using a random page off of a random website.

Professional Reaction: The most important part of this chapter was the information on evaluating sources, and the qualities that go into reliable sources. The qualities, according to the chapter, are: the source is authoritative, accurate, objective, current, and comprehensive. If a source is all of these things, then it is a good one to use for backing up arguments.

Found: Google images search "books"



Chapter 16 Reading response.
By Sarah Daly

Professional Response. In this chapter it explains the different resources that are available the explains the benefits and the disadvantages of using them. They talk about the importance of using  un bias and creditable sources. They speak highly of databases and school libraries due to the filtering of creditable material that they allow in. especially compared to the Internet in which you have to be very careful about the integrity of the material.

Personal Response: I feel like this chapter is a very good summary of what has been gone over in class this semester in regards to finding good and accurate sources that can enhance the papers we are writing. i found the part about Evaluating sources very helpful. Determining if the source is authoritative, accurate, objective, current, and comprehensive are great ways to narrow down a good source.



https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR413NP7DEW0blMk_ZnN0mL2qhWHxkyYkKUvZFLx0rFoGmbxgal5w




Chapter 16 Finding and Evaluating Sources

By Sarah Moore


Personal Reaction:
If I were to sum up this chapter in one sentence, I would say its content is on the importance of using college library databases. It thoroughly goes through the steps to find your research topics, such as what keywords to enter into the search bar, how to navigate the database, etc. I found the information this chapter provided to be helpful, especially since our class will be using a lot of these libraries for our upcoming research paper. 


Professional Reaction: 
Chapter 16 is everything about library databases in a short, concise five pages. It talks about the pros of using library databases, how their information is often more reliable and helpful, versus the regular internet, which can give false information or not be filtered well. Next the chapter leads us through detailed steps of how exactly to locate information on the internet, which, in this modern day is pretty much a learned skill. However, it was still nice to review on how to enable a key word or subject search function. All-in-all, it was an enlightening chapter for those who have trouble navigating the internet, or for others simply just a review. 

Photo Credit: Google Images