Grammer Video: They're, Their, and There

Music Credit:
"Elevator Music Part 57." YouTube. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Oct. 2015. 

"Elevator Music Part 56." YouTube. N.p., n.d. Web. 20 Oct. 2015.

Possible Outline for Sarah Holzmeister

I.   Introduction

     Thesis Statement: In America we place in high regard helping and protecting our mentally and behaviorally dysfunctional members of our community but leave their caretakers physically and mentally broken without any resources.

II.  The physical and mental toll the caretakers face
  
      A. What are the tolls and what causes them
      B. What they could do to prevent it

III. Cost of treatment

      A. How much it costs to treat out of ones own pocket
      B. How businesses could help lower cost

IV. Governments roll in helping

      A. Government resource's that help the caretakers
      B. What the government could do more to help

V.  Conclusion

Fallacies: Personal Attack

Personal Attack:
This fallacy means that the author is attacking another person for what they said or believe instead of attacking the idea itself. The attack is directed towards there character instead of being towards the issue or point being made.

How to Avoid: Keep your bias about the other person to yourself. Attack their opinions, not them.

Exemplification Essay

Thesis:

Reading teen magazines is stunting growth and development of teenagers and is setting up unattainable standards for them to live by that are leading to mental and physical illness.

Just Walk on By by Brent Staples

Chapter 8: Just Walk On By 

Comprehension: 
1.Because she saw herself as a potential victim of what she thought he was, as well as a victim to the ignorant assumptions of what America thought African Americans were.
2. It was Staples realization that he had the power to change the atmosphere in the space around him.
3. Insomnia.
4. The obsession with the power to intimidate. Young, poor, and powerless men crave the control that can come with power.
5. Moved with care, stayed in the shadows, avoided nervous people, let people walk ahead of him, and whistled classical tunes.

Purpose and Audience: 
Thesis: "It was in the echo of that terrified woman's footfalls that I first began to know that unwieldy inheritance I'd come into-the ability to alter public space in ugly ways." (page 239)
2. He uses a combination of logic and emotion, and his strategy worked because it could hit you on different levels and gave the reader empathy of what Staples was experiencing.
3. He seems to assume that the audience has prejudice against African American people. He challenges that thinking with his side of the story and how it makes him feel to see people basically run away from him.
4. His intent is to hook the reader to want to know more, makes them wonder if he's dangerous, etc.

Style and Structure: 
1. Staples mentions Podhoretz to have more credibility and support. Podhoretz grew up in fear of black men, which enforces Staples' point that most Americans are prejudice. 
2. It was the best introduction, I don't see how it could've been better. 
3. Since there are twenty or more examples, all direct in what he's trying to say and making a solid point for him, there is enough support. Some examples that could be more convincing would be some studies, or statistics.
4. His order was perfect for presenting his argument, and even if the examples had been in a different order, the paper still would've been just as effective.
5. Assassin, bandit, bully, mobster, criminal, gangster, goon, gunman, hooligan, murderer, rioter, rowdy, troublemaker, delinquent, gorilla, hood, killer, punk, ruffian, gang member, hired killer, professional killer. They absolutely differ in connotation.

Journal Entry:
Nora Hixson: In my experience, there was a time when I was in the mountains with my family for Christmas break. I was injured at the time, so when my family went out to ski, I stayed in the lodge by myself. While sitting there, an older man came up to me while getting ready to ski himself, and began asking me personal questions, such as where my family was, why I wasn't skiing, and if he could see my injury (which I had told him was my knee.) He got uncomfortably close to me during his questions, but I do not know if that was just my paranoia. After reading Staples' essay, I do not think I would've reacted any differently.

Amin Halimovic: When I was traveling back from Bosnia, at the London airport my family and I were boarding the airplane. My family is Muslim and my brother had a moon and star pendent dangling from his neck. This trip we took was shortly after 9/11 happened. We were waiting in line to board the plane as we got closer and closer to enter the plane my brother was randomly pulled aside so that they could search his carry on. I feel they did this just because we are Muslim.

Sarah Holzmeister: For the last five years I have worked with violent
male offenders as being a female in a predominantly male environment there was differently stereotypes for what i could do and what i was capable of handling as a female.

Sarah Moore: I can't recall a particular experience in my life where I was blatantly afraid of a person or perceived them as dangerous, but there were certainly times when I was younger and walking the streets alone, when I'd prefer to cross the street not at the cross-walk where lone men walked. I've always had this sense of caution, unfortunately against people who may can appear more rough (?), but after reading Ben Staples' account, my perception has changed. I want to change how I view people, ordinary people walking on the streets. Most likely they're just that, ordinary people. 

Writing Workshop:
3. Staples observation is fairly accurate; we've all seen examples in our own lives that support this as well. The male upbringing comes to play when fathers teach their sons at a young age, for example when they begin grade school, to not let other children hit them, and if they do, to hit them back. What he means by the male romance statement: getting that rush from seeming more powerful by using intimidation.

Blog Review: whatever.scalzi.com

     
    It was a difficult tie between blogs lifehacker.com and whatever.scalzi.com, as they both had quality content and received high ratings from the group, but in the end whatever.scalzi.com took first place for best representing the quality criteria list used for determining a good blog. The quality criteria list are things such as credibility, posts being up to date and consistent, organization, and creativity so that the blog is visually appealing. Evidently, all of these factors were found in this whatever.scalci.com. Out of the four blogs each group member reviewed, this one was superior. 

    The author for whatever.scalzi.com, John Scalzi, is credible as a famous science fiction writer, former president of the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America, and creative consult for many science fiction television shows and video games.  Because of his identity as a well-known author, the information in his blog posts are intelligent and relevant to the literature world, and he often has thoughtful insights on varying books. The blog is also organized, for example there is a small calendar on the right of Scalzi's website that shows where each post is and what day it was posted on, making it easy to navigate, and therefore user friendly. Something that the rivaling blog, lifehacker.com, lacked was the overall visual appeal and creativity. Whatever.scalzi.com has an image on nearly every post, a header image at the top of the blog which changes regularly, and Scalzi sometimes even incorporates his own photography. 

    Using the quality criteria that was developed in class, it was decided that whatever.scalzi.com was the ultimate choice from the four blogs that were reviewed. It's creativity, organization, consistency, and author credibility set it apart from the other three, and made it the favorite in the group. This blog was captivating, credible, and creative, and would definitely be worth reading.

Amin Halimovic

Topic: Technology in Education

More Specific:

• Easier for students to learn
• Technology is more appealing to students
• The Internet has a lot of information to use

Forming an Arguable Sentence:

• Technology in schools is making it easier for students to study and learn.
• Technology in education makes learning more interesting for students because it appeals to them more.
• The Internet helps students learn and study because there is so much information on the Internet.
• Technology in education makes it easier for students to learn, it keeps them more engaged, and the internet has information about almost everything.

Working Thesis:

Technology in education makse it easier for students to learn, it keeps them more engaged, and the internet has information about almost everything.

 

Blog Ratings

Whatever.scalzi.com
     Sarah Moore gives this blog a 9, because it has everything but diverse topics. It was mostly focused on book reviews, as the author is a book author himself, there wasn't a lot of varying content.
     Sarah Holzmeister gives this blog a 7, because although it's creative and organized, it lacks variety.
     Nora Hixson gives this blog an 8, because it lacks current events.
     Amin Halimovic gives this blog an 8 because he posts very frequently and has many interesting blog posts about whatever.

Mental Floss
     Sarah Moore gives this blog a 6, because there were very current topics, but it lacked organization and easy accessibility.
      Sarah Holzmeister gives this blog a 7, because everything seems interesting and diverse, it's just hard to get to.
      Nora Hixson gives this blog a 6, because it was ridiculously hard to find specific topics to read about.
     Amin Halimovic gives this blog a 6 because even though the blog is creative and has a lot of pictures it is just hard to navigate.

Lifehacker
     Sarah Moore gives this blog an 8 because it had a little bit of everything, the topics were useful for everyday life, maybe could be a little more visually appealing but otherwise it's very good.
     Sarah Holzmeister gives this blog an 8 because of the consistence of the posting and the quality of the content. It lacks humor and doesn't pull the reader in.
     Nora Hixson gives this blog an 8 because it seemed to have current topics as well as diversity, and it seemed easy to navigate and read.
     Amin Halimovic gives this blog an 8 because the blog is organized and easy to follow, the blog posts are also very appealing to me.

Hot Chicks Dig Smart Men
     Sarah Moore gives this blog a 5 because the posts were based more on her opinions only, and the content is a little dry and hard to relate to.
     Sarah Holzmeister gives this blog a 4 because of the lack of credibility and isn't visually stimulating.
     Nora Hixson gives this blog a 5 because the content was dry and unappealing as well as mostly being just based on her views.
     Amin Halimovic gives this blog a 5 because the author does post a lot but the things she posts about do not draw my attention to her posts. It is somewhat boring to me.

Thesis statement     “The E-blurt like so many other forms of communication is about power.”

Supporting bits-  

•   I am busier then you hence I am more powerful than you.
• Hip for spelling errors more powerful for them.
• Reminding people that you’re the boss by making them work it out.

Counter Argument

1.       Legal implications for subpoenaed emails. ( not professional)

Conclusion “Which only confirms what I’ve always felt about power; the people that really understand it doesn’t say anything at all.” 

Reading Response

Chapter 3: Arrangement

Amin Halimovic

Click for Link

Personal Reaction:  The material in chapter three is nothing new to me. All throughout high school and other English courses that I took at Front Range instructors have taught students how to arrange their essays. Although most of the material in chapter three is familiar, I learned new tips on how to start an introduction. Knowing these tips is very helpful because I struggle writing introductions. So far the text book and what our class has been assigned to read has been review for me.

Professional Reaction:  Chapter three is a very important chapter to becoming a great writer. In this section the authors teach the reader how to recognize patterns to help format the specific type of essay being worked on. The tips and examples given in this chapter are useful tools to use, and knowing how to structure an essay properly is essential when writing an essay.  

Let Steroids into the Hall of Fame

Written by Zev Chafets

Q. What is the writer’s general subject?

A. The general subject in this essay is the epidemic of steroid use in the baseball hall of fame and how, whether the public likes it or not, “chemical enhancement is here to stay.” (22 Chafets)

Q. What is the writer’s main point?

A.That ultimately steroids are inevitably going to be used by athletes, especially in baseball, and even substances like steroids are already being used by the youth.

Q. What are the writer’s key supporting points?

A. “Purists say that steroids alter the game. But since the Hall opened its doors, baseball has never stopped changing”. (22, Kirszner ~ Mandell)

One of the key points Chafets makes in his essay (above) is that the game of baseball was always bound to change; it was never supposed to stay constant, but be altered by things such as more protective uniforms, its demography, the time of day the game is played at, and now, the use of steroids.

“On any given day, the stands are packed with youngsters on Adderall and Ritalin (stimulants used for attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and college students who use Provigil (an anti-narcolepsy drug) as a study aid”. (22, Kirszner ~ Mandell)

The point given here by Chafets is that the adult baseball players are not the only ones using drugs to enhance their performance.

Q. Does the writer seem to have a particular purpose in mind?

A. The purpose is to brace the public that enhancements like these are going to be used regardless of their acceptance. It’s better to just get used to them.

Q. What kind of audience is the writer addressing?

A. He seems to be addressing the general public, but probably more in particular, the people who are skeptical or outraged by steroids use in the Baseball Hall of Fame.

Q. What are the writer’s assumptions about the audience? About subject?

A. The writer is assuming that the reader is against steroids, and therefore is writing to them on how it is unavoidable and they should just accept it. About his subject, Chafets seems to be somewhat ignorant to the harmful effects steroids can have on a person, (examples such as depression, liver damage, and cancer,) but is writing in a way that assumes steroids are harmless.

Q. Are the writer’s ideas consistent to your own?

A. Not really, the author has a very narrow approach to steroids.

Q. Does the writer reveal any biases?

A. The author is partial to steroids, and doesn’t agree with the public who are against them.

Q. Do you have any knowledge that challenges the writer’s ideas?

A. The author is not taking into account the serious and destructive effects steroids can have. Though Chafets says, “But baseball players aren’t children; they are adults in a very stressful and competitive profession. If they want to use anabolic steroids, or human growth hormone or bull’s testosterone, it should be up to them”, (22, Kirszner ~ Mandell) simply because they’re adults doesn’t mean they should make stupid decisions, such as taking steroids.

Q. Is there any information missing?

A. There isn’t much of a counter argument, or a more realistic view of what steroids can do.

Q. Sequential or logical links missing?

A. None that could be found.

Q. Can you identify themes or ideas that also appear in other works your have read?

Not many that could be compared to the essay.

Q. Can you identify parallels with your own experience?

A. There are several situations from our experiences that can be compared. For example, the use of other drugs (like marijuana) will be used whether it’s legal or not, similar to Chafets argument on steroids.

WORKS CITED

Kirszner, Laurie G, and Stephen R. Mandell. Patterns for College Writing: A Rhetorical Reader and Guide. Boston: Bedford St. Martin's, 2001. Print.

Setting Goals

By Amin Halimovic

I interviewed Sarah Holzmeister to get her perspective about learning English. Many students cringe when assigned an essay, but writing should not be a subject to stress over. Sarah feels comfortable about her writing skills because of the forms of writing she uses daily, her past experiences with writing, and her goals for this English class. While English can be a difficult subject to understand, by studying and having useful tools anyone can excel at English. Writing is a part of our everyday lives.

            Sarah like most of us writes throughout the day, she writes text and emails to friends and clients. As a treatment councilor Sarah writes lists and summarizes at work. She writes lists for jobs to do around her house. People might not think about writing, but like Sarah it is around us all the time. The types of writing Sarah does is not the only thing that makes her comfortable about writing.

            In past experiences Sarah has been in many English classes throughout her schooling life. It is Sarah’s first time taking English 121 here at Front Range. In many of her English classes Sarah has participated peer editing, and Sarah has used libraries for assistance in writing. Sarah has yet to use the campus library, but it is her goal to use it this year.


            Sarah’s goals for this class have a big role in her becoming successful in this course. While Sarah is comfortable with her writing, formatting and citations are two areas of writing where she believes she struggles. One of the hardest parts of writing is starting for her, but when the writing begins it is easy for her to finish. Her ultimate goal for this class is to pass, putting in hard work and having goals Sarah should have no problem passing the class.



Link for Picture

            Seeing Sarah’s point of view on English helped me learn more about writing. I’ve learned there are many students like myself that struggle with writing. Sarah and I have many goals for this fall semester, and most of these goals we have are based on our problems we foresee related to English. These problems that we perceive should not be a concern, because with the help of our English instructor and peers we will pass this class. Sarah wants to get a degree in social work to help others, and I know English will only help her get this degree.